Won’t fill you up much, trust me.
So, like, Tolkien’s Hobbits, right? I mean, if anyone’s the poster child for cozy living, it’s a hobbit. Clean homes, warm fuzzy community, good eats – what’s not to love? That “Tales of the Shire” game? Sounds like it’s got a good standing start. But somehow… it gets a bit undercooked.
Picture this: You’re wandering the timeline snug between “The Hobbit” and “The Lord of the Rings.” Gandalf makes an early cameo, yay fans! You’re a custom hobbit, fresh off the cart at Bywater. After a quick housewarming, you’re tangled up in village politics, aiming to stamp Bywater on the map officially. Meetings turn into quests, mostly a game of chatting up locals until someone invariably needs a casserole. And, yeah, Bywater’s not huge, but it’s a maze – you’ll be loop-de-looping all over. Still, the charm in the writing pulls you into finishing what you start, I guess.
Cooking! That’s the big sell. Grow your carrots, forage your mushrooms, all paths lead to dinner. Perfect for hobbit-y stuff, but man, it wears thin. Every task ends the same – invite folks over, tailor a meal to their taste, cue the identical cutscene of them happy-eating. Nothing’s super wrong, but it’s not enough to hold up the whole shebang. And while you’re dishing out food, oddly, your hobbit’s never famished. Isn’t that kinda anti-hobbit? Still, it’s super chill – maybe the chillest game of its kind – never in your face or too demanding.
Days roll by, you juggle farm life basics, talk to the NPCs, respect their shop hours. Lose track of time, and if you’re not careful, you’ll wake up groggy, but hey, no real penalty. Early on, though? Hit this awkward lull of having free hours with nothing to do but fish aimlessly.
Nintendo Switch fans, heads up: it’s on both Switch 1 and 2. Graphics hold their ground on both, but honestly, they’re kinda blah. Character designs, meh, with a slightly off vibe. But hello, dwarf woman with beard! That’s a win. Frame rate hiccups more than you’d like on the older Switch and even the new one can’t clean up entirely. Definitely an asset streaming thing, as it’s Internet glitch city when racing around the world. Oh, one sky-turns-hell-red bug on the Switch 2 gave me a heart attack briefly – didn’t manage to repeat it on the old Switch though. Hopefully just a one-off, but who knows. Biggest pain? Crashes. Literally every 20 minutes or so. Became my auto-saving guru, no lie. Losing quest progress, this game nearly tuckered me out some nights.
“Tales of the Shire” is like a beautiful jigsaw with missing pieces. The base idea is solid gold. A beta version begging for the polish it deserves. As it sits though, it’s kinda flimsy. Factor in tech hiccups galore, even Switch 2 can’t power through, and the stability issues – you get why it’s a tough sell. Yearn to love it? I do. Maybe one day it’ll stand proud. Just not now.
